Women:  Remove Hiking From Your Tinder Profile

Women: Remove Hiking From Your Tinder Profile

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At this point, I’d prefer a woman saying she likes long walks on the beach.  At least I can enjoy the eye candy of other women in bikinis there.  Something that can get me hard after months of the same boring vagina.  There’s also alcohol nearby, as well as other distractions that will keep you from talking nonstop for hours on end.  If we go hiking I have to listen to you, and only you, while I wonder if jumping off that cliff might end the suffering.  

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I don’t care if you go hiking, and I don’t understand why you would pick so many hiking photos considering the small portion of your life it consumes.  You can do it at most, like once a week?  Maybe twice if you’re that dedicated?  Unless you’ve done something that very few people have done like climbing Mt. Kilimanjaro or hiking the entire Pacific Crest Trail, just leave it out.  I would prefer to see what you actually look like instead of distant pictures of you and a sweeping landscape.  I have more respect for women who have survived the rigors of Friday night bar shenanigans than the safety of a hiking trail.  

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So, leave it out.  Assuming that your obsession with hiking isn’t due to your fear of intimacy and you do get a boyfriend, hiking will be about 1% of your entire relationship.  It’s not going to strengthen it.  If anything you’re going to end up with an awkward two hour return after you found out he was cheating halfway through the hike.  Eventually the bottom of that cliff will start looking good to you and you’ll take a long solo hike and never return.   


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